09 October 2007

Silly Short Stories - Kena Slapped?

During the Year 2003 National Day Rally, the then PM Goh mentioned about a story involving a certain Minister slapping a fellow Minister. PM Goh said "I must be suffering from amnesia. I just cannot remember this incident!" Well, I don't think he is suffering from amnesia because the incident didn't happen...
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According to the records in The Kin Jio Leaf, the ministers gathered for their regular afternoon meetings. Now, normally in the meeting the coffee boy called Koh Pee Buoy would prepare the drinks (be it coffee, kopi, teh, teh susu etc) for all of them. On that particular day, Pee Buoy was on medical leave.

"What! For the last 30 years he has never reported sick!"

"What's going to happen to my Kopi Oh?"

"and my Teh Susu?"

"I will not be able to think without my Earl Grey..."

Everyone started to panic...well almost everyone except the wisest among them all.
"Gentlemen, the world will laugh at us if we cannot get things done just because we're going to miss our afternoon tea... just get another fella"

And so, they proceeded with their meeting while someone went to get someone to make prepare the drinks. That someone's someone was Poon Lar Par. After being told what the ministers normally like to drink, he went to prepare and serve them. At this point, there was a heated argument over a certain policy where a certain young minister argued with 2 older ministers. Well, arguments in meetings are normal but Poon Lar Par was a bit buay song because he always thought that old people must be respected...how can the young upstart talk back to the elderlies like that? Boh tua boh suay! After serving all the ministers, Lar Par left for the canteen for his own tea break. He met his colleague who's also his trusted childhood friend, Soh Tong and started to tell! "Wah you know har...that young minister! How can he? He think he work so long and can talk back like that!" Lar Par ranted.

"Young minister? Long? Who?" Soh Tong asked.

"Ya la! Who he think he is? He long, people longer! Kena lan!"

"Who? Did you mean Loong or Hu? And who is Lan?"

"Aiyoh! Are you listening or not...that young chap talk back like that. His father never teach ah? Should be slapped man!"

"Who slapped who?!?!..."

"Ya la! The way he talk har, it's like a slap in the old men's face you know...eh, I gotta go, I think the meeting is over. I have to clear up...if not Pee Buoy come back tomorrow I sure kena slap by him"

That night, Soh Tong went out with his neighbour, Poh Sim Boon, to the nearby kopitiam for some kopi and smoke. Well, their wife don't allow them to smoke in the house so they went to the kopitiam to smoke lor...moreover kopitiam got Tiger Show mah...Ya la, Aunty Show who serves Tiger beer.

"So,Tong, how's it like working in the midst of all these big people?"

"Like that lor, I do my work, they do theirs"

"Any juicy stories, huh? Must have la! Heard anything or not..eh I heard they wanna ban smoking in kopitiam, really ah?"

"Huh? Wat? I wasn't listening...I was thinking about wat my friend told me this afternoon"

"What what! Say leh!"

"Well, Lar Par told me something about someone kena slap"

"Who? Who kena slap? By who? What? Where? When? Why? How?"

"I dunno...he said something about a young minister slap old minister..dunno wat long and who and lan...aiyah! I dunno la, don't tell har...wait I kena sack"

"I know already! The young minister must be Loong, who slapped Dhanabalan who sided with R. Hu!"

"How you know?"

"Who else got name containing Loong, Lan or Hu!"

"Oi! I never say that hor. No la, no la...I also dunno what happened! Dun anyhow say hor, som par, som par!"

"Donch worry, I WILL NEVER TELL ONE, I, POH SIM BOON, swear that if I anyhow tell, I'll never get to see my CPF!"
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Well, so you see, that was how the rumours got started...to quote the words from PM Goh's speech - "
Now you know how creative Singaporeans are!"

2 comments:

little gecko said...

Awww..., has da ape thot of how much his story is worth? Our pay & pay govt would probably pay da ape for da copyright to it... ;p

khirsah said...

no need, no need...it's free for all...everytime our gahmen pay us something, we'll have to pay back 10 fold :p