Back To School

It's been more than a month since ape walk his daughter to school everyday. Ape's daughter is in primary one now. The school is just across the road from where ape stays.

The first week was kind of messy but the school has prepared the parents well. The school has invited parents for briefing weeks before school starts. The principal spent almost an hour briefing us about the school, explaining the approach, describing what would happen during the first week or so, where to drop our children, where to pick up our children, what would happen, etc. Yes, the first 3 days was messy but that's expected. Everything more or less settled down by the fourth day base on ape's observation... except punctuality.

The school expected the children to be in the school by 7:25 a.m. so that tthe flag raising ceremony can begin at 7:30 a.m. sharp (exactly like the way it was several decades ago when ape was in school). Therefore, ape was a little surprised that after leaving his daughter at school, (occasionally at 7:25 a.m. sharp), while walking back, ape saw some students strolling to school... with their parents. Ape reckoned by the time they reach the school gate, it must be 7:30 a.m. or later. Are parents really that indifferent towards punctuality? Anyway, by the 3rd week, the school has taken a firmer approach and closes the gate at 7:30 a.m. Apparently, some pupils (and parents) are undeterred still, although there's significantly lesser now.

Anyway, school is fun really or rather, ape enjoys walking his daughter to school. The walk might be 5 minutes but it allows ape to indulge in small talks with his daughter. Seeing so many people walking towards a common direction for a common purpose makes ape feel so alive again. It's very unlike the zombies in trains, bus and roads where everyone seems to be rushing to somewhere to do something but dunno what.

The routine ape went through in the last 2 decades was wake up, wash up, go work, wake up , wash up, go work, wake up, wash up, go work. Before this year, ape couldn't recall when was the last time when ape wakes up before the sun rises to feel the cool morning, steps on the cold tiled floor and speak in low soft tones. The only times when ape feel the dawn were days when ape had to stay out late or worked overnight and arrived home at daybreak. This year is so different and walking my daughter to school brought back so much fond memories.

When ape started school, some 3 decades ago, mommy ape walked him to school. Ape's mum works in the school so that's not too much of a problem and we usually arrived in school at 6:00 a.m. You see, ape's mommy is what one might call, a school janitor or back then, she's called Ah Soh. Mommy has to open the school gate, school office, turn on the tuckshop (canteen) lights, etc and ape delightfully helped her do these... afterall, not everyone has this privilege to sneak into the principal's office and sit on his chair. Then, ape would go to his usual corner and wait for his classmates to arrive. We'll chat and as more friends arrive, we'll play games such as police-and-thief (catching), tok kar (catching but hopping on one leg) and sometimes when the girls were more obliging, they'll invite us to play zero point (skipping ropes) or five stones. Almost everyone was eager to go to school simply because school was fun. Playing together made us feel good about learning together and it didn't hurt so much when we were punished together. It was the "togetherness" that give ape so much fond memories.

In case you're wondering, the picture is the school that ape attended... in fact, ape was in the class situated at the highest floor at the corner. You'll never see another pupil wearing the school uniform anymore. It's been closed down and merged with two other schools.

Things We Take For Granted

Something came into my thoughts and I decided to put it down in writing. I'll share more of my thoughts at the bottom of this post. Do share yours with mine.

***********************
You're in love

So is the man who loves you

You're so in love that you want to make a vow,
To live together in the legal estate of matrimony,
To love him, comfort him, honour and keep him in sickness and in health
and forsaking all others, be faithful to him, so long as you both shall live.
So does he

You're so in love that you want to declare your love to everyone and anyone
and receive the blessings from those who love you

So does he

You're so in love that you'll devote your heart, mind and body to him

So does he

You're so in love that you want to raise children with him
To see them grow and realise their own potential
and to be valuable members of society

So does he

But you can't,
you can't live together in the legal estate of matrimony
you can't declare your love to everyone
you won't receive the blessings
you can't devote your body to him
you can't raise children with him, not even if all you're asking for is adopted children

not only that,

you can't apply for subsidized government housing
or place his name under the beneficiary of your life insurance

Neither can he

Because you are a man

******************************

I wonder how many of you were thinking about the gender of "You". Gender aside, what if the last statement has been changed to

"Because you are of a different race / religion /social class"

What will your thoughts be then?

I realised, after I went through these thoughts, that there are so many things that we, heterosexuals, happily married people, take for granted.

We happily walk into that tiny building in Fort Canning Hill to register our marriage. Declare our marriage vows to our friends and family. We even hold lavish banquet and receive loads of well wishes.

We're granted subsidized public housing, we can put our spouse name as beneficiary in case the unfortunate happens to us. We can adopt children even if we can't have any.

We hug and kiss our partner publicly when we happy, we do the same when we're sad. We can do all these because we love and are capable of loving. Why can't they?

Pink Dot Sg

Ape is proud to be there, with his wife and daughter.

You be your own judge on how you and your family want to live your lives. Please don't judge others how they live theirs as long as they do no harm to others and are happy.

We Are AWARE

Updated on 9 May 2009

Ape is really a peace loving person. For that matter, ape is always a firm believer of listening first, decide later, action latest. In order to be able to listen first, one has to be open minded, non-judgemental and empathetic. That is the exact reason why ape supported the original AWARE. The ousted new-EXCO headed by Josie Lau did the reverse of what ape believes in - that is action first (by taking over the EXCO) and listen last. Thus, ape can never support or condone them.

Stay Alert and Be Vigilant

If you've not read in the papers, stay alert and be vigilant of a flu pandemic. A new strain of the flu virus, commonly know as swine flu has spread to countries including USA, Mexico, Canada, Spain and Scotland as reported in Today Online.

In Singapore, efforts have been made to step up pre-cautionary measures (reported here and here) in order to prevent a recurrence of tragedy when Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) hit us back in year 2003.

Ape was in the airport on Sunday and apparently, Changi Airport wasted no time in rolling out the temperature screening machines that were used during the SARS outbreak to detect for any signs of fever of its passengers. Ape supposed the Immigration and Checkpoint Authority will be particularly observant of passengers arriving from America and Europe.

Just yesterday, at ape's workplace, we were told to take out our business continuity plan and go through them... just in case Alert Level has been raised to Orange.

Just this morning, when ape returned to my NS unit for medical checks, the public announcement system called for all medics to assemble for morning brief. One out of the two medics who attended to ape left for the brief and returned to update his buddy on the precautionary measures to be taken. Just before ape left the medical centre, tables were placed outside the rooms... presumably to prepare for "pre-screening" before letting visitors into the centre itself.

As of now, while ape is writing this, CNA on TV says that the Alert Level has been raised to Yellow.

Keep yourself updated on the news and development and stay alert for any signs of flu. Take care everyone... for yourself and your family. Ape has to find his masks and personal thermometer. Ape wonders if there's anymore masks or thermometer in the pharmacy below.

Ape Supports AWARE

Ape Supports AWARE... and ape don't mean the bogus new EXCO. In ape's previous post, ape has already made known and urge any readers here to support AWARE by signing the online petition here.

What are ape's reasons besides those stated in the petition?

1) The removal of the old guards was clearly a deliberate and pre-planned coup, orchestrated by a certain Dr Thio... who self-proclaimed to be "feminist mentor". Ape has heard of Braema Mathi but who is this self professed Dr Thio Su Mien?

This tells ape the new EXCO (and supporters) lacks humility.

2) The new EXCO allege that AWARE had strayed into promoting homosexuality and intend to set AWARE back on its correct path. If this is true, why can't they address this concern in an open debate? Instead, they went in stealthily and staged a coup.

This tells ape the new EXCO is capable of dodgy actions.

3) All the sub-committee heads, include internationally known Braema Mathi who heads CEDAW were removed from their positions without reasons ... and a simple thank you.

This tells ape the new EXCO is disrespectful and lacks decency.

4) The locks were changed, effectively keeping out the old guards from saving their documents. The centre's manager was fired for "not following instructions" with no further elaboration when the manager had wanted the new EXCO to explain their actions to the old guards.

This tells ape the new EXCO is unreasonable and will force its way through.

Ape suppose the above four reasons is more than enough for ape not to support them. What has the old guards done, anyway, that wins ape's support?

The old guards have maintained their position and objectives clearly and soundly. They embraces diversity in race, religion, culture and sexuality. To ape, the key word is embracing diversity which apes finds is particularly important in this multiracial, multireligion and multicultural society. Embracing diversity is also one of ape's beliefs. So if you do share the same belief as ape, please lend your support by going here and here.

(If you noticed, ape has not mentioned anything about religion other than the last paragraph. The reason is simple. This AWARE saga has nothing to do with religion. It's about our ability to mature as a society in whole and truly progress as a great nation. This is also the reason why ape got involved in this misunderstood "38 38 women thingy")

School Is Fun! Really!

School is really fun! If you know how to ask the right questions... if not, you can still make it fun by behaving like an absolutely insensitive moron ragging your peers or just a moron being ragged by your peers, video captured and posted online and laughed about it.

If only ape had been like them (ape meant the two mentioned below, not the morons above) during his younger days...

"TWO Singaporean teenagers have designed a 'sponge' that can possibly mop up massive oil leaks at sea.

Hwa Chong Institution student Tan Ding Jie and River Valley High School's Gu Tianyu, both 17, spent their year-end school holidays last year experimenting with a 'superhydrophobic membrane' that repels water, like a lotus leaf, while absorbing organic solvents such as oil.

Their project was one of 59 developed last year under the Young Defence Scientists Programme (YDSP), a joint effort between the Defence Science and Technology Agency and DSO National Laboratories.

The annual programme, begun in 1992, helps students venture beyond textbook theories by working with defence technology professionals.

Instead of enjoying time off during the holidays, Ding Jie and Tianyu holed themselves up in the laboratories of the National University of Singapore (NUS) to find the most cost-effective material to absorb grease or oil leaks. They were mentored by scientists from NUS and DSO. ..." (Straits Times, March 16, 2009) Click here to read more.

You see, ape was once a very bright kid. If ape had been better, he would be a lawyer or doctor... or a doctor who desperately need a lawyer or a lawyer desperately needing a doctor. However, when ape reaches that weird period in life called "teenage", ape became... weird. (Maybe ape has never grown out of teenage... or perhaps he did but had not loose the weirdness... whatever?!?!)

Interests in being curious was lost and curiosity took a turn in interest towards, erm other more sociological and biological subjects. The problem was, sociology and biology was not taught in secondary school - at least not then and biology was offered to smart students only if they can cope with physics and chemistry. Come to think of it, this arrangement makes sense. You have to have some chemistry before getting physical and only when you know what you're really getting into then the biology of life takes place... but again, with or without you knowing what you're really into, biology of life will take place... know what I mean? Don't? Told you I am weird, didn't I?

Anyway, ape's academic performance took a dive. In case you're wondering if the cause of ape's falling grades had something to do ape's independent venture into chemistry, physics and biology out of school's curriculum, nope, that was not the cause... ape didn't get lucky.

You see, studying has to be enjoyable, education has to be fun! Ape had lots of fun in primary school. There were no stress, no targets to meet and between ape and his primary school friends, never once did we compare our grades. Most of us lived in a small humble town called Taman Jurong and our parents mostly blue collar workers.

However, in secondary school, things took a different turn. Ape enrolled into one of the top schools. Competition was high. Teachers are worried about our grades. Students are worried about their grades. The parents are worried about their grades. ECA (now called CCA) was also a competition... with other schools. Ape was thrown into a very competitive environment but ape has never been a competitive sort of person. As if academic performance and ECA was not enough, there's a certain subtlety within the students and teachers to compare the family backgrounds of students.

Ape certainly didn't score on that either. But this is not want ape want to say, especially to my teenage or weird readers. The point is, when you feel stressed about school and studies, and you lost interest... beat up your teacher, rag your peers and burn the school down... ... ... no, just joking, don't do that... maybe just beat up your teacher. No seriously, don't beat up your teacher, rag your peers and burn the school down.

Seek knowledge that interests you. I mean knowledge, and not subject, that you can relate too and interested in. Ask your English literature teacher why people in Shakespearean time talk funny with Dees and Daos anon. Or 500 years from now,will the students then ask why is it students in the 21st century talk funny with words like OMG, LOL, XD? :p

Ask your biology teacher about the birds and bees... and why, even though you took protection, your girlfriend got pregnant! If you're taking history, ask why was World War II started and not when it started. Ask how did it end and not when.

Ask your mathematics teacher if he had ever used Fourier Series, other than teaching it. And how can maths help you solve the equation of,

John+Jane)=unwanted x preganacy

where,

protection ≠ broken ≠ expired

Ask yourself what would you like to know about the subject and not what is going to be delivered to you in the curriculum. Don't be afraid to ask questions and questions don't have to be smart... only answers need to be smart. In case your teacher gives you stupid answers such as "That's not in the exam" or "You don't have to know this", well, you can still try ragging him/her... or substitute John or Jane and see if equation proves true.

Buying a (HDB) Property

Ape sold his HDB flat a couple of months back... when property market was still good. Nope, ape did not make any profit - ape only managed to break even. How much ape (and wifey) took out from CPF to furnish the loan (including interests), how much ape (and wifey) returned back to our CPF. It's like saying ape has lived in a HDB flat for close to decade... for free :=)

For those of you who are considering purchasing a HDB flat, ape has no advice for you since ape is no property guru. However, the following was what went through ape's mind when he embarked on the journey of "owning" a property. (BTW, one doesn't really own a HDB flat since it's only good for a maximum of 99-years lease, that is, if you live long enough, the flat will be returned to HDB and you won't get a single cent in return)

What For?
The first thing that got into ape's mind was the objective of purchasing a property. What was ape buying a property for? To speculate and earn money or what they call "investment"? To live nearer to ape's workplace/parents/mistress (oops)? Or simply wanted a place to stay and able to declare "Welcome to OUR humble abode"? Well, it's all a bit of the above (and perhaps more for others) but ape set priorities and put "A place to stay and call our own" at the top.

Listing these objectives is important because they would eventually shape the choices and availability of the property ape were looking for. Therefore, with the priorities set, certain options such as "renting a property" or "staying in parents place" were ruled out.

HDB or Private?
First off, private property was (and still is) out of the question. Ape's income simply could not afford one. So ape turn to HDB. Ape didn't think further than affordability then. However, ever since, ape hears a lot of advice to make HDB your first property, even if you could afford private property. One of the reasons is that, should you ever wish/need to switch from private to HDB, it will be very difficult and it's not about affordability. Ape will leave that to the experts to explain.

Direct or Resale?
But then hor, should ape buy direct from HDB (supposedly subsidised?) or from the open market? Since ape was a first time buyer, ape can still enjoy a certain amount of grant ($40K then for a 4 room HDB flat) which more or less made the differences between direct and resale flats close to neglible - as far as $$$ is concerned. Eventually ape chosed buying resale for the following reasons:-

1) New flats were developing in places too far from parents (hey! ape still want to visit parents regularly hor!)

2) New flats were developing at areas not close to MRT (hey! ape no peanuts for private transport hor!)

3) Ape has to wait for a couple of years before the new flats are complete (hey! ape was getting married hor!)

To put it another way is that there's more flexibility in getting a resale flat instead of purchasing direct from HDB.

Where and Affordability?
So ape zoomed in on our requirement, that fulfilled our needs and start checking out the prices of resale flats in areas (near parents and/or MRT stations) to get a feel of "market rate". Next, of course is affordability. With our paychecks, we can afford a 5-rm or EC HDB flat but we decided against it. For the following reasons:-

1) The floor area for 5 room is big...which means we'll have to sweep more often, mop more often, pay higher Service and Conservancy Charges. BTW, Town Councils' Sinking Funds investments were not known and rebates base on flat type was also not popular then. So when all those news came out, ape said "Heng ah! Lucky I never buy 5 room flat!"

2) Whatever that went into our CPF would be utilised to service the housing loan... for the next 30 years! What? Did someone say "But your money just sit in the CPF cannot use for other purposes?"

But ape thinks simply, mah!

Firstly, can anyone guarantee that ape will keep his job for the next 30 years? On top of that, his income will at worse remain stagnant and will never decrease? Last time ape checked, no one gave such guarantee.

So how much can the ape afford? We estimated on this basis:- the monthly installment to furnish the housing loan should preferably be around 50% of our monthly CPF Ordinary Account (OA) contributions and not more than 75%. You'll need to do a bit of reverse engineering to establish what should be the purchase price of the flat. Other things ape had to consider was exactly how much loan would ape be taking? The loan cannot be more than 90% of the purchase price and cannot include any Cash-Above-Valuation (COV). On top of that, your initial CPF would be wiped clean first. (Ape will probably explain this in more details in the next post... but then again, ape thinks you shouldn't be lazy...so go HDB to find out the latest updates)

Why did we pick this figure of 50% of our CPF OA? Since no one can gaurantee that we could keep our jobs for the next 30 years, ape had to prepare for the worst - that is in case ape or wifey or both of us had been out of job! Let's say if ape was out of job the very fist month when he start furnishing his loan... where can he find the money? Not forgetting CPF already wiped clean. From his own savings, right? Then who's going to pay for S&CC, utilities, bread and butter? However, since ape applied the "50% rule" and if the ape was able to hold out for say 3 months before losing his job, he would be able to furnish the housing loan for another 3 months, right? The longer the ape keep his job, the longer he'll hold out if he loose his job. Boleh? In fact, if ape could afford it, he would not even want to stretch his loan for 30 years... the longer you loan, the more interest you pay!

So far,we're still on housing loan. We had to consider the cash sum, too. Thnigs that cannot be paid by our CPF, including Cash-Above-Valuation, property agent fees (if you're getting one), renovations and furniture. All these have to be worked out before one actually commit to purchasing the property.

So after working out our objectives, setting our priorities and calculated our affordability, the rest was a breeze - find a place that we like, give and take a bit base on priorities and make an offer within our affordability. Seller not impressed? Move on and find the next.

We got our first home within 3 months...I think. Had been staying there happily since. So why sell now? Well... objectives changed (or perhaps not) but priorities certainly changed but ape will tell you more next time.

For The School Or For The Students?

I shared the same frustrations with Mdm Wang about being enrolled into one of the "top" secondary schools. I was in the top 10 percentile in my primary school and managed to be enrolled into one of the "elite" secondary schools. Well, I maintained in the 10 percentile, only this time , it's the bottom 10 percentile. It was easy to be discouraged and disappointed. It did not help also that you have classmates who come from wealthy families where their parents can provide whatever extra resources to help them cope, including good and sound advice on how to manage their studies, choosing the right ECAs, what to aim for higher learning etc.

However, one difference between my school and Mdm Wang's was that my principal did not request that students drop weaker subjects "so as not to pull down the school standard". When some students really did badly in their exams and failed to make the bare minimum to promote to the next level, they were asked to be transferred - not because the school was afraid that the standards would drop. It was for the interest of the student - to place him in a more compatible environment. To help him re-build his confidence.

Indeed, one of my classmates was transferred in that way and when I met him a couple of years later, he told me that his confidence had improved and managed to stay focus on his studies. He would have given up on his studies had he remained in that top school.

Well, my school achieved the intended objective of helping this ex-classmate of mine. However, was the school worried about students pulling down standard? I am one of those who contributed to the school standard drop yet I graduated. The best part is, my form teacher continued to be encouraging on the day he handed my nothing-to-be-proud-of certificate and told me to continue to give my best. I'm sure I disappointed him.

Anyway, that was almost 20 years ago... I wonder if it has changed to be like Mdm Wang's.

Foreign Workers Abandoned

I just cannot understand how could companies be so uncaring?

Left to their fate - Group of 179 foreigners among a growing number abandoned (Today, 18 Dec 2008)

According to their report, their registered employer is Tipper Corporation, a marine company. Tipper claims that Mr Uthayanan (whom the foreign workers though is their "boss") was supposed to look after the workers and train them before placing them on a project next year.

Ministry of Manpower clarified that "Tipper Corporation remains responsible for the upkeep and maintenance of the workers, and if they fail to fulfil their responsibility, they will be committing further breaches of the law."(Today, 18 Dec 2008)

I wonder how many of such cases will surface in the coming months in view of the economy downturn.

-----------------------Updated on 24 Dec 2008-------------------------------------------
Seems like there may be hope yet... at least for some of the 179 workers. Apparently, while waiting for MOM and the employer, Tipper Corporation to investigate and resolve the issue, some members of the public and some NGOs came forward to provide food and alternate lodging for the workers.

Also, according to a report in Today, 23 Dec 2008, their owed wages will be paid. However, the fate of the workers, or at least some of them still remain unknown - will they be repatriated or gainfully employed long enough for them to pay the debts they took to come here to work?

May people be more giving, not only in this festive season but all the time, whenever we can.

Keep In Touch

OK, I've been lazy and not updating my blog frequently. Apologies to my handful of fans who still come in once in a while.

I joined one of the social networking website - Facebook. Actually, I joined quite some time ago and managed to connect to some of my friends I maintained contact anyway. However, in the last month or so, I found my primary school group in Facebook. Little did I expect that a simple class photo could get me connected with several primary school friends. We have been actively updating with each other. Almost everyone (including myself) will respond to a friend invite with "Wow!" or "Amazing!".

A lot of reminiscence... a lot of nostalgia.

There's A Part For Everyone

Regardless of what the rating may be, I'd say Nation Builders is a very good film to remind us that there will always be people out there who needs help... no matter how well a nation develops or progresses economically. Never, ever leave them (the elderlies) behind because someday, all of us will get old, economically unproductive and possibly a liability to people around us.

Some may think that the destitute have only themselves to blame... so not working hard enough when they had the chance. Is this the case for every single one of them? Perhaps not. They could have been mislead. They could have been ignorant about economics and poor in understanding financial planning. They could have little or no education to start off with. So, I urge everyone, please don't leave them behind. There are many simple ways to help them such as buying tissue paper from them, give you unused card boxes to them or simply give them a token of appreciation for their singing or do what Think Happiness suggested.

We reap what we sow.

Some Dreams Can Never Be Fulfilled, Can They?

Don't be mistaken. I'm not in this particular video neither am I related to these musicians... except I played the same musical piece back in my school days.



Those were the days. Those were one of the proudest moments of my life. Thinking of such moments makes me sigh. Listening to musical pieces like these, overtures that I had played before, almost make me cry. It is such a pity that more than a decade of music passion has gone to dust to be replaced by mundane rat-race. Hope the next generation gets more opportunities to develope their potential and not be moulded to whatever field the state wants them.

It's Not Just The Men...

Reading An Eligible Beauty from Today, I felt inclined to tell ex-Miss Singapore, Ms Teo, that not only Singaporean men have little confidence in dating women with "higher qualifications", Singaporean women too, believes so.

Relating a personal experience - I was falling head over heels over a girl... many years back... way before I know wifey. (Pardon me but at this juncture, I must admit that I have to thread very very carefully in case wifey turns white, green and red and then I get a broken head and a wounded knee... after she break my head with a bat and made me kneel on cockle shells :p)

As the years progress, our path diverge. To put it simply, she went to uni and I went into poly and we lost contact a couple of years after that. Interesting part was when I talked to my friends about her, many of them (mostly women) asked if I was at all concerned that she'd be a graduate and I a diploma/others. I couldn't and still can't understand what has an academic certificate got to do with a relationship? Isn't the ability to communicate and share happiness (and misery) more important? We're not applying for a job, are we?

Anyway, to cut the long story short, we lost contact not because of the differences in our academic qualifications but simply, we've left adolescence and sought our life objectives in different path.

I've found one of my life objectives - wifey, I wonder if she has found hers? Or perhaps she, like Ms Teo is "over qualified" that not many potential suitors dared to ask?

I've to stop writing now... gotta take out the thrash...now where did I leave the bat and cockle shells...

Growing Up - Religion, The Introduction

Sorry, folks... been busy lately doing someone else's job... but that's life.

In my previous post some time ago, I mentioned that I'll talk more about growing up in Singapore or should I say, MY growing up in Singapore. (Noticed how egoistic am I? :p)

Anyway, as I was on my way home just now, thoughts about my religion, or rather, my journey into discovering religion came into my mind. So, I will blog about it here.

I was born into a typical Chinese family and religious inclination is a mixture of Taoism and Buddhism... just like any typical Chinese family in Singapore. I had no idea what is Taoism or Buddhism. I just followed what my parents, and grandparents, did. We worship the Goddess of Mercy (which is in line of Buddhism), Tian Gong, Guan Gong, Tu Di Gong and our ancestors (the latter are more in line with Taoism). Nevermind if you do not know these deities but just to let you have a brief introduction to the polytheistic nature of traditional Chinese faith in contrast to the monotheistic nature of other religion such as Christianity.

Like I said before, I merely followed what my elders did and went through the religious rites without knowing what we were actually doing. It was until about the age of 10 when I started to be more explorative and involved in understanding religion and it was actually Christianity where I started off.

It all started when I would "sneak" into the church right beside the HDB flat where I used to stay. Theplayground in the church compound is particularly attractive :p. Furthermore, churches are typically peaceful. Occasionally, I would attempt to go as far as into the building itself and sit in the Sanctuary (where mass service is held) and contemplate. It was on one such incident when Pastor Yap caught sight of me and extended his invitation to the Saturday children session with promises of singing, games, story-telling and friends. The songs, games, stories and friends certainly appealed to me and before long, I attended the Saturday sessions regularly.

It was obvious that all the songs and stories were related to the Christian faith and it was through those where I started to understand Christianity more. Before long, I was baptized through prayer and the Saturday service was no longer just about fun. Don't be mistaken - the singing, story-telling etc still went on but I went to church for reasons more than just fun. I was slowly discovering another aspect of myself, i.e. my perceptions towards the world beyond mortal affairs. Furthermore, I discovered certain potential in me when I was occasionally tasked as the song/prayer leader and even a team leader once, during a church camp. Well, actually it wasn't something great as other kids did get their chance but my point is we were given opportunities to take lead at one time or another. From the bible, parables and sermons, I begin to see more into the adult world... the real world.

However, my going to the church wasn't warmly received in my family. My dad was openly skeptical about Christianity with me. My mom was skeptical too but she's more reserved on her opinion. In any case, my parents had never forbid or restrict me from going to church.

On one occasion, I got an earful from dad when I say grace at the dinner table, thanking God for providing food for us. My dad had a poor grasp of English but he certainly knew what I said. "What did Jesus do to provide food for you?!?! I worked so hard to feed the family and you thanked Jesus instead of me, your father!" Well, both my parents were workers with little education and they certainly worked very hard to feed this family of six. I can understand his unhappiness. Since then, I made my prayer in my heart. If I'm still a Christian now and if my dad is still around, having dinner with us, perhaps I'll amend my prayers to "Thank you Lord, for giving us a father who worked so hard to feed us, and for giving us a mother who can cook so well (my mom can really cook)". But my dad is no longer around and I'm not a Christian now - I'm what they call a Backslider.

There are several reasons why I backslided. The initial reason was that when I went into secondary school, the ECA took its toll on me. Saturday was full day ECA for me, not the typical half day. That left Sunday for me to attend church but Sunday is the only day when I have full day for my family. Following my missing church, a few upsetting incident happened with the members of that church which made me lose faith. One of it was that a couple of the church members went to my home, supposedly to enquire why I missed church. I was in school for my ECA, as usual, and my mom attended to them. My mom didn't know that I seldom attend church service then and explained that she didn't stop me from going.

Sensing that they were unable to get anymore answers from her, they turned their attention to the deities and ancestor tablet place on the altar and remarked that my mom was worshiping idols (in Mandarin, the word is rock). THAT upsetted my mom and she retorted that she respected their rights to they religion and respected her son's choice in religion and told them not to make such insulting remark on her choice of religion. If we had knew about the Seditions Act then, those two fellas could have ended up in jail. My mom didn't tell me about that encounter immediately then when I returned from school... still respecting my choice. There were other incidents with some Christians, personally experienced by myself and finally made me gave up Christianity totally.

Before anyone say I am against Christianity and attempting to spread not-so-nice messages, let me add that another person (Lay Hoon's the name) who got baptized with me, had a totally different experience. Her life had certainly changed for the better. She had certainly found hope in Christianity (and I have no idea how is she doing now since I stopped going to church). My experiences with some were not pleasant but that was mine experiences. I was almost against Christianity at one point of my life. Thank goodness, a sound minded Christian friend once told me, man can fail you because it is human to err but God will not - do not judge a religion base on the actions of man. With those words, I'm managed to keep an open mind about Christianity and any other religion.

If there's a church nearby with its doors wide open, perhaps I'll sneak into Sanctuary and contemplate once more. :p

Feeling So Guilty

Not too long ago, I just passed my Individual Physical Proficiency Test (IPPT). Before that, I was thinking about keeping physically fit, not just for the yearly IPPT but also for my health's sake... thinking, like I did every year. True enough, I thought a lot about keeping fit for the last week or so but hardly did any exercise (if you consider a stroll in the park to be exercise in the first place). Not only that, I pampered myself with these:


Got both of these and quite a few other dishes at Chomp Chomp in Serangoon Gardens a couple fo days ago. The crab soup was delicious and guaranteed with roes at less than $10. Arrghhhh.... the cholesterol!!! Anyway, got quite guilty over it so the very next day, I headed straight to the gym for some workout.

I was quite surprised with myself when I managed to pull 4 STANDARD chin-ups... enough to pass my IPPT :p and even more surpising was that I managed to clock a better timing than my RT-IPPT when I attempted the 2.4km run on a threadmill. Ok, ok,,, these achievements are nothing to brag about but it is still my personal best sinc the last 4-5 years. Hmmmm... was it the crab soup? Anyway, I told myself to maintain this standard for at least a year and not only will I be able to pass my IPPT next year, I can even get a Silver Award!... or should I aim for a Gold Award? :p

What's My Mood?

Many years ago, a group of us were receiving our training somewhere at the eastern side of this little red dot. On one particular morning, when we just stepped into our class. This statement was scribbled on the board - "I'm so happy I can lick my own ass!" No one knew who's the joker who wrote that but we were laughing and speculating how do this person lick his own behind?

However, this statement has been etched in my mind for may, many years. Whenever I am elated, "I'm so happy I can lick my own ass!" comes to mind...

And this is exactly how I feel this evening... because I passed my IPPT! This means no more RT... no more burning 3 evenings every week for the next 4 weeks... no more dieting, no more training, no more... WAIT. I think I should just maintain my fitness and continue exercising regularly. For the sake of my health and not just for passing IPPT.

P/S I haven't figured out how can a person lick his own behind... do you think contortionist can do it?

Mind Over Matters?

Just had my 5th RT session. For the uninitiated, RT is known as Remedial Training. You will be blessed with RT if your fail or did not attend your IPPT. IPPT is Individual Pa Pok Test... no lah. IPPT is Individual Physical Proficiency Test. It is compulsory for every NS liable Singaporean to take the IPPT once a year. Since I'm still an Operational Ready NSmen... or so they term us but I still regard myself as reservist, I'm still required to take the IPPT once a year. For my last IPPT window, I failed my 2.4km run... ok ok... to be honest, I would have failed my chin-up also if I had not cheated a bit... a little it of jerking and not keeping my arms straightened :p

Of all the stations, consisting of of 4 static stations (shuttle-run, situps, standing broad jump and chin-ups) and a 2.4km run, I always have problems with chin-ups. Every year, during the test, I will fail by 1 or 2 chin ups... and have to re-test or attend RT. Since the days of my Basic Military Training, standing under the chin up bar would make my heart pump faster and I'll conjure butterflies in my belly. Only in the last recent years, I have problems with running the 2.4km also... just managed to pass.

I've always wondered what is it that keeps me from passing my IPPT.

Is it due to lifestyle?
Or perhaps diet?
Maybe it is work stress and the lack of time for exercise?
But I think all the above are excuses. I smoke but there are chimneys out there who can get gold medal for IPPT. The Company's Best PT during my BMT is one such example. Diet wise... well, I'm not obese and my BMI is still within the ideal range. And I have reduce my intake of fatty and high cholesterol food. Lack of time and stressed by work is also not an excuse... afterall, I'm one who do not believe in selling my soul to my employer.

So what's keeping me from training for my IPPT? I believe it is this...Mind Over Matters. I just have to keep to a strict regime of exercising regularly. I must keep reminding myself that exercising is not just to pass my IPPT. It is to keep my health stable as well. Afterall, age is not slowing down for me and as the years pass, I am finding it harder and harder to keep up and maintain my personal standard.

For a start, I have to train to pass my RT-IPPT in less than 2 weeks. Wish me luck :p

The Best Birthday Gift

I have been receiving birthday gifts but non is as special as this card. It is made by my daughter, Trixie. Did I say I am very proud of her? Nothing beats a simple card that is original and comes with sincerity. Not only did she give me a card, she called to wish me a happy birthday.

My Son, Tate

Woohooo! First, I must thank wifey for having to carry our new born son, Tate for the last nine months. He's a healthy, not-so-little guy weighing slightly more than 3.7kg at birth!

Not any less lovable than our first child (Trixie), Tate's coming to this world brings a special significance to my family. If you've read my previous post, my father passed away late last year. What most of you do not know is that, exactly 3 weeks after my father's death, my brother joined him. No one knows what made my brother take his own life but apparently he was suffering from depression, something which we suspected but didn't know it was that serious. It was a very, very difficult period for my family. So when wifey and I came to know that Tate is akan datang, I wasted no time to spread the good news to my mum and the rest of the family. BTW, Tate's arrival was not planned... at least not by us, so I'd thought there must be someone out there watching over us and present this gift to us.

OK, so much for the sombre part. Let's move forward to the more positive outlook in life... Wifey and I felt that his name should start with a letter T like his sister, Trixie. Did a search for meaningful boys names starting with the letter T and my oh my, the names are limited. Eventually we filtered down to two - Tate and Theodore. Personally, I preferred Theodore which originates from Greek meaning "God's gift". Wifey preferred Tate which is of English origin meaning "Cheerful". Each of these names have different variations like Tait, Taitte, Tayte for Tate and Ted, Theo, Theodorus for Theodore. Eventually, I relented and agreed on Tate. Theodore may be a bit of a tongue twister for our non-native English speaking families. Besides that, the name Tate is more related to Trixie which means "Bringer of joy".

During gestation, Tate is unlike his sister who is more placid. Right from the end of the 1st trimester, his movement can be felt and he moved alot through the rest of the pregnancy. I wonder if he aspires to be a gymnast. Besides that, wifey felt contractions very often too. When wifey was carrying Trixie, the only time she felt ONE contraction (and a relatively mild one) was when she was waiting in the delivery ward for the hospital staff to prepare the operations theatre. With Tate, it was a totally different matter. I just hope we can educate Tate to be as well behaved as his sister.

Also, Tate grows fast. Last weekend when we were shopping, people gave obvious about their stares when they look at wifey. One even remarked, "Wow! So big!" 3 days back when wifey went for her medical appointment, Tate's estimated weight was 3.4kg!

Last morning, when the amniotic fluid started to flow out (one of the signs that the baby is about to come out), we grabbed the bag and hailed a cab. The driver is a nice chap and told us that he'll go slow for a smooth and safe ride to the hospital. Wifey said something that made him promptly floored the accelerator, beat a red light and almost did a drift. I had to harmonize the speed correcting that he need not go THAT fast and added that we didn't want him to be booked by the traffic police. He laughed it off saying it's alright. If TP did notice, he would explain the situation and we might get a free escort to open the traffic ahead for us. We reached the hospital safely anyway.

Everything went through smoothly and Tate is delivered after a C-Section and this time, I am not suffering from shingles and managed to be in the ops theatre with wifey and Tate the moment he is born. Tomorrow will be another day where we'll have to jia you cos there'll be many years ahead of us.



For those of you who do not know what's a C-Section (Cesarean Section), follow this link to watch the video clip of how babies can be born. (Warning: It can be gory and upsetting to some)